It starts this morning about 3am. I’m sitting awake because the neighbor couple that moved in last month are shouting at each other yet again. I never can distinguish what the man is saying, but the woman has a few choice phrases she says all the time. Here are some examples: “Don’t corner me!!!” “Oww you’re hurting me!” “Oh you’re sick. You’re really sick.”
Well last night was a special night. Accompanying the yelling, I hear a screeching truck on the road in front of the house. So I got up out of bed and went into the guest bedroom window in the front of the house. Their red(neck) truck is parked down the street and they are running up and down the street yelling at each other.
I had grabbed my phone and now tried to dial 311, which does not work in Phoenix apparently. I went to my computer to look up the non-emergency number for the police. I found it, but couldn’t decide whether I needed emergency or non-emergency. Finally I decided that the police wouldn’t do anything anyway. So I resolved to call the HOA on Monday and just get them fined or kicked out.
Because I was up so late, I got up a little later than usual. Thank God I didn’t have to work! As a result, I missed the cat’s daily 5am wake up call for food.
When I did get up, the cat just stayed on the bed. I thought that was odd that he didn’t immediately run over to his bowl and start crying. Well, I’m not going to complain about no noise, so I just sat on the couch for a while and caught up on some Tivo.
Around noon thirty, my honey called me and I chatted with him while doing my usual “phone pacing” around the house. I wandered into the bedroom.
“OMG! WTF!?!!”
I know Fred thinks I planned this for while he was on the phone, but I was shocked by what I saw. I’m guessing the cat was mad. He had pooped and peed all over the bed. “Dear God, please help me not murder a cat today!”
I was livid
and out of laundry detergent. So I had to drive to Target as this was not the kind of laundry that can wait until next week. After picking up the detergent and a few other necessities (chocolate), I got back into the car and started home. I realized I wasn’t ready to go back to the cat, and the mess, and the yelling psychos, and the agoraphobia. So when I turned up Cave Creek Road toward my house, instead of stopping at home, I just keep right on going.
Not sure where I was headed, I knew that it would be beautiful to drive up the hills into the towns of Carefree or Cave Creek. So I did. It was great. I put the windows down and soaked up the sun and let the wind mess my hairs. I felt so free.
But this was not the usual sleepy drive into Cave Creek. The difference was immediately made apparent for surrounding me was bikers on huge motorbikes in all directions. Above my head there was a banner across the width of the road that said “Fiesta Days Rodeo.” What had I stumbled upon?
Everywhere I looked there were burly men in leather, muscles under white tanks tops, between their legs the rumbling power of their monster-sized motorbikes. I passed the Horny Toad Restaurant. The parking lot was filled to bursting with bikes.“Maybe I could just pop in for a quick drink. Just one.”
Oh god, no! That would be a disaster. Not to mention the end of my life. I obviously didn’t
belong in this group. Good thing my dark shades concealed my popping eyes. Fear won over temptation, and I quickly made a U-turn at the Lazy Lizard. Still engulfed by unfettered male-ness, I made a beeline for the valley. The closer I got to the edge of the hill, the bikes thinned out. I watched as Cave Creek got smaller in the rearview mirror, scanning for any sign I was followed. Relieved, I saw no one.“BRRRROOMBRRRMMM!
My head snapped to the right. I forgot the blind spot! The dreaded blind spot! I’ve been found out!!! Equal parts scared and excited, I questioned the sanity of the sexy danger fantasy.
Just then, the bikes pulled around me in an eruption of speed and noise...
...and disappeared.
Wow! That’s was just adventure enough for today. Now I can go back to the cat, and the wee hours, and the laundry, and the writing.
and the living.
2 comments:
Thank you. That's just what I needed. I laughed so hard. You're a good story teller. You should consider a career in writing or something.
Hello. This post is likeable, and your blog is very interesting, congratulations :-). I will add in my blogroll =). If possible gives a last there on my blog, it is about the Câmera Digital, I hope you enjoy. The address is http://camera-fotografica-digital.blogspot.com. A hug.
Post a Comment