"...these are my seats. I give them to people who like music..."

How can I possibly write a post about seeing Tori Amos on tour and do it justice? There's no way I can say enough! Nevertheless, this is going to be a marathon post. Are you ready? Here we go:

Last Wednesday, Freddy and I went out to San Diego. This trip had been planned for months and I thought it was never going to be time. He surprised me with tickets to see Tori. So the wait for December 12th began.

I hadn’t been in the San Diego airport since January of 1994. I didn’t remember it at all. What I do remember is how my parents told me my life would be ruined if I went to California on that trip. I was willing to take that chance. They were right. California got stuck in my brain and I have been trying to go back as often as I can.

After we arrived and checked into our hotel, we decided to take a look around the “old town” area. We saw some really neat looking houses.

Walking around the funny little street with all the tourist trinket shops we ran into a Mexican restaurant called “FRED’s” I was so excited. We HAD to eat here! So we had a couple margaritas and quesadillas and brought home a souvenir glass! I love it!

The show that night was amazing in so many ways. Anticipation proved to be too much for me. Unable to stay in my seat, I went to the front to check out the stage and Tori’s Bösendorfer piano.




This guy opened for Tori. His name is Yoav. I think. He said his name 42 times, but I never understood it. He was really cool actually. Everyone really seemed to enjoy him. Loved the British accent. Maybe I'm an Anglophile like Tori?






There was a brief wait. Then the lights went down again. Everyone screamed. I was holding my breath scanning the stage to see which of the Dolls would be coming out tonight. (if you’re STILL not caught up on who the Dolls are, see my previous Tori post.)

Then someone in the balcony screamed. The curtain parted and Santa came out and danced around the stage as the band played.

She open into Body and Soul. After She’s Your Cocaine she took a break to pour mojitos to the band.




Next Hoochie Woman and Raspberry Swirl, and then Santa was gone. Wait. Gone? No! Come back! Santa only did four songs.

After a brief break the curtain parted again! I was expecting to see Tori, but I was shocked to see Isobel! I assumed from the crazy cheers that went up that the rest of the people were shocked as well. San Diego was the only time on the entire tour that there was more than one of the Dolls in a show.

Isobel open with Yo George. The lighting was amazing all night and Yo George was one of my favorites. It looked like an abstract American flag. It was perfect for that song.


Isobel also did Mountain, Tombigbee, and Scarlett’s Walk.


Then there was the Professional Widow (remix) intermission. It was so much fun.




After the break Tori came back to Big Wheel, Cornflake Girl, and the Doughnut Song.




























The band took a break and left for the T & Bö section. It was so amazing! Tori gets so much out of a piano. Her passion and energy is very addicting.


She did a little improvisation then launched into Twinkle and an unscheduled (!) Leather. I LOVE that song! I especially get a huge kick out watching Tori perform it. “...if love isn’t forever and its not the weather, hand me my leather...” The expression she gets is so cute.



The band returned and continued with Your Cloud, one of my favorites from the Scarlett’s Walk album. I think I nearly squeezed Freddy’s arm off at this point (sorry Freddy). I cried through the whole song. It’s a song about separation and how it seems impossible to do so from the love of your life. “...if the rain has to separate from itself does it say ‘pick out your cloud?’...”

Next was Virginia.





Tori ended every show on her tour with Code Red. This time, though, things went a little differently. All night there were these two women who kept wandering around the floor. They were getting drinks and chatting with each other like they were in a coffee house or something. I don’t know if this is true but someone said that when they found their way to a couple seats in the front row one of them was on her mobile chatting away. Well, it proved to be too much for Tori...

(watch the whole thing. it is an amazing performance. but especially up to two and a half minutes in.)



She kicked their asses out of the theater! It was amazing!!!! Everyone went crazy! Tori began again where she left off with a newfound i'm-not-gonna-take-it passion. Code Red was such a perfect song for this! "...what you stole i would have given freely..."


Immediately after, everyone rushed the stage to be in the front with the “people who like music!” The first encore was Precious Things and Bliss. Both are top Tori songs to me! Second (!) encore was Space Dog and Hey Jupiter. (No. I don't know whose hand that is.)




Here’s the set list that didn’t play out exactly as planned. I loved the show we got for sure!


The night was pure magic. Freddy said I didn't stop grinning the whole time.
Not ready for it to end, we went outside to wait to see if Tori would come out and say “hi.” I’m not really an autograph person, but I just want to be near Tori and say “hi back” and hear her talk to every one.

Poor Freddy waited with me in the cold for 2 hours! (Love you so much Freddy!)

I think because of earlier incident Tori didn’t relish a confrontation with the booted women. So when she did come out, she made a beeline for her bus. Honestly, I don’t blame her. Plus it was very cold that night. We did get to meet and chat with some other rabid Tori fans. That was fun.

I can’t believe her tour has come to an end. It was a really incredible show. If I could have, I totally would follow her around the countries.

Please tour again soon Tori! I love you!

the cure for the holiday spirit (qotd:120607)

I’m starting to get into the holiday spirit. You know, the fear that years are passing you by while you blink, worry that next year will be the same, and paralyzing depression. I thought that maybe I would feel better after shaving, showering, and getting out of the house. I’ve been trying to see the sun at least once a day.

So I was out running an errand for my brother at Borders, and I may have stumbled across the cure for this holiday spirit. I was in the Paradise Valley Mall (PV Mall to the locals), so I thought I might as well stop in “Puppies ‘n’ Love.” It won’t hurt just to look.

I wandered around awhile looking at all the things you can get for your dog. That’s when I realized that this “all things dog” store had 200 different styles of leash and harness, but nowhere in sight was dog food. And there were x-mas ornaments with your dog’s picture, but no “accident” cleaning supplies. They have enough doggy clothing to fill a trunk and play dress-up for days (let me tell you, this is where I get suckered into it). Yet somehow when ordering inventory for the store, someone neglected to put those little bags you use to pick up poop on your 5 daily walks on the list. hmmm...

That’s when I realized that is how they get you. They show you all the fun stuff, and none of the responsibilities. So when you get to the $2000 (correction: in interest of fair reporting, the Chihuahua was $1999) adoption fee for your little bundle of joy, it seems worth it.

And why does a living being come with a 2 to 4 year warranty? There’s something disturbing about that to me.

Anyway. The cure: I really did have a great time seeing the puppies. It was like being at the zoo. Their frolicking and barking made me smile. The best part though? I don’t have to clean up. If one of these doggies makes a mess, I can simply leave the store. Nice, huh?



I stood there trying not to grin too much as the little Chihuahua tried to eat his cage mate, and overheard several mothers in the store with their children. Their conversations with the kids were so amusing.

I overheard one say, “I love the Shit-tzu.” Then her son said, “Mom, you already have a Shit-tzu.” To which she whined, “I know, but I want it!”

Then I heard a young girl ask her mom, “What kind is that? It’s soooo cute!”
“The sign says it’s a puh-pill-lun.”
I shuttered involuntarily.
“What’s that?”
“I think it’s a cross between a Pomeranian and something,” the mother surmised.
I tried not to judge. It wasn’t that long ago that I didn’t know that breed either. I resisted the urge to correct her. But in my head I became Wikipedia.com’s page on Papillon. It’s actually pronounced paw-pee-yon which is the French word for butterfly (and nasal it up! this is French, okay? not Freedom Fries day at the White House). This breed got its name from the way the adult’s ears and face resemble a butterfly.

In her defense, Pomeranian is a great guess for this fuzzy looking puppy! awwww!
And with all these designer breeds these days, who knows what they’re gonna cross next.

As depressed as I may get, it’s good to know I haven’t lost the time-honored tradition of looking down on the common folk. Oh look! I really am in the holiday spirit!

entertainment at target (qotd:120307)

I woke this morning thinking, “I need to buy deodorant.” Well, not so much thinking, as smelling. But either way I was all out. So I was on my way to the bright red circle in the sky. (Target for all you regular folks not living in my fantasy.)

On the way, I ran into some pretty lights that made me feel like I had driven into one of those Corona commercials. It’s beginning to look a lot like Feliz Navidad! love it! (I took these pictures on my mobile while driving. so give me a break on the quality alright.)






Anyway. I picked up my favorite flavor of deodorant and then wandered around the rest of the store awhile. I went to check out the electronics section. I always inexplicably end up there for some reason.

I resisted buying Invasion of the Body Snatchers (only $9.44!! I know! I should have gotten it.) and checked out Target’s price for Super Mario Galaxy for Wii (ouchy!).

As I was leaving the area to go check out, I crossed paths with two very young boys. Their conversation went something like this:

stripped shirt: Where’s your mom?
blondie: I don’t know. But if she’s not going to stay in one place, I’m not going to carry around this chick flick “Hairspray” any more! (throws the dvd onto the nearest shelf)

And that’s very close to a word-for-word quote.
So much anger from a boy around seven years old! I wondered to myself where he learned to say “chick flick” with so much disdain at such a young age. I bet his dad is a wonderful, loving man. Either that or here’s a 7year old who is desperately trying to hide a secret.

okay?

It's weird the things you think of at weird random times... (qotd:112307)

take tonight for instance...

It started when I was walking into the bedroom. Suddenly I hear the one sound that strikes more fear into my heart than any other sound I have heard recently.

“hmgggh. hmmggngh. hmngggkggh. ckk ckck hmckkk”

A chill went up my spine. Then down again. I look under the bed and there’s The Cat (Herman) preparing to hack something up. “omg!” I’m yelling, “GET OUT of there!” I yank the bed out to grab him.

Too late. There’s already a yellow and brown puddle with flecks of greenery. I can still recognize the food he was begging me for not an hour earlier. It’s no wonder he’s barfy! I don’t think he ever chews. And that smell! I turn away making a similar gagging noise of my own.

Then I see him running away. Not wanting him to create a secondary crime scene, I follow. He runs into the kitchen.... “NO! Don’t go in there!” Before I can grab him, he is in the cabinet (He can open the cabinets. It’s his favorite hiding place.). I open the door to make sure he’s not barfing in there.

“Hissssssss” This sound I’m totally used to. It doesn’t startle me anymore. It has now become The Cat’s standard greeting for me. Then the screaming...
Have you ever heard a cat scream like a child being poked with needles? I have video if you’d like to.

Now this particular cabinet is not shallow. It’s more than half of my body length deep. And I’m over six feet tall. I really don’t want to have to get inside it to clean up after sick cat. Again. So I wrap a towel (for the biting) around my arm and reach in.
A few attempts and a few scrapes later, I finally pull him out.

Then I recognize another smell. It is distinctive to this particular animal. If you smell it you will never say, “Is there an elephant around? Cows? a dog perhaps?” No (though you may wish it was one of the above) that is the distinctive smell of cat poop!

“oh god oh god ohgodohgod...”
The Cat, the towel, and anything in between is covered in poop. Still holding onto The Cat, I check my person. Nothing on me. Okay...
OMG! There’s some on my exposed finger!

I start to hum to myself to distract myself from hurling. It’s the same way I used hum when doing my paper route at 5am in Wisconsin in the dark to keep from getting scared. “hm hmm hm hmm hm hmhm hm hm hmhmhmhmhm...”

I take The Cat into the bathroom with outstretched arms, watching for drips. I set him in the tub and close the door behind me and run to the sink to scrub like I’ve never scrubbed before. Then I return to the bathroom where The Cat is now out of the tub running around. Aaaargh!

“You brought this on yourself kitty.”

He was surprisingly quiet. Went like a real trooper. He accepted his fate like a brave solider. But I guess he was probably just as happy as I to be poop free. And he didn’t make a peep through the entire bath. Yes, I gave The Cat a bath. And he squirmed a little and tried to get out. But overall he was silent the whole time.

Having him cleaned, I put him in the laundry room by his liter and water. I put on rubber cleaning gloves and entered the kitchen. Peering inside the cabinet, I suddenly realize I’m going to have to crawl in there to clean it.

I start to hum again.
And I was tempted to leave it for Freddy. The Cat, after all, is his animal. Then I remember he won’t be home until Tuesday. It can’t stay there that long. damn.

More humming... That’s when I realized what I was humming. “...mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord... He is trampling out the vintage where the grapes of wrath are stored... He hath loosed the fateful lightning of His terrible swift sword... His truth is marching on... glory glory hallelujah...” The Battle Hymn of the Republic?

I spent the rest of the clean up inside the pretty place in my head. Distracted by the task of trying to remember all the lyrics. It really is strange what your mind will bring up in times of stress or discomfort. weird.

After showering in hydrogen peroxide, I treated myself to cheese and olives dipped in sour cream and hot sauce. I deserved it.

i statements (qotd:112107)

so i just realized that it has been a month (!) since my last post. it’s funny (ironic?) that my last post was “then i sat down and started writing...” the thing is that i really did do just that. i have been writing, just not to this blog. i’ve had things i wanted to write, but didn’t sit down and take the time. i have been too busy writing to write.

i’ve also been buried deep within my own head. so far in i can’t see straight. it’s really hard to believe in your goals and yourself all the time. it’s even harder when those who are suppose to be “near-and-dear” tell you that you won’t make it.

just last night someone said to me, “so if you never get to do this thing that you want to do, what else do you want to do?” translation: what’s your back-up? ‘cause you ain’t makin’ it! my answer was nothing. i believe that having a back-up is setting yourself up to quit or fail. and i’ve done that back-up thing too long. now is the time to just do it.

as yoda famously said: “there is no try. only do or do not.”

then, after telling another friend what i’m doing in the pursuit of my goals, this friend starts telling me to go back to school and get another degree! aghast, i replied, “i still owe a mountain of money for my last degree!” and just because it may be a more practical vocation does not make it something i want to do. in fact, the practicality of it is what turns me off about it.

and then there’s the issue of certain family who don’t understand why i don’t want to move to north carolina, video-tape weddings and make wedding cakes (even though they will never be supportive of my people getting married), or find a meaningless job at a soulless corporation just to live. that’s not living. that’s passing time waiting to die.

there is no way i could hate any of these people though. in their ways, they all just want what they think is the best for me.

but i have come to realize one thing. really i’m realizing it again. it’s something that is always preached. and its something that i’ve always known. but suddenly i’m taking in the full meaning of it.

i am the only one who knows my path.
i am the only one who can accomplish my goals.
i am the only one with the will power to take action.
i am the only one that will help me.
i am the only one who can believe in me.
i am the only one who knows that i’m going to get there.

everyone else has their own issues, their own problems, their own motivations, their own success, and their own life to worry about.

my new mantra: i have to make it happen.

then i sat down and started writing... (qotd:102007)

Paul Budnitz is the founder and president of Kidrobot. The place where the toys of your dreams are made and sold (some results many vary). I ran across this post of his while reading his blog.

"Being creative has nothing to do with your mind. The mind exists to judge, to criticize -- because it's a survival organ, the mind's primary function is to make sure we're safe, to judge if that yellow blob over there is a scary lion or a broken bulldozer. The mind can't deal with uncertainty, and being creative is always, always putting yourself in the land of the uncertain. To the untrained mind that's equivalent to walking into traffic blind. The prospect of something new, something that arrives out of nowhere is intrinsically terrifying to our egos.
There is no place for the mind during the process of actually creating things. We take advantage [of] our minds later, at the end of the process, to evaluate if what we have made is beautiful, ugly, scary, worthwhile, or might land us in jail.

Learning to become perpetually creative is nurturing the habit of getting our mind out of the way. Writer's block is just a habit. The amazing thing about human beings is that we can nurture new habits. We can retrain ourselves to create differently."

words to take to heart. not easy though. i think i'll reference this thought often when i feel i can't write. sometimes you have to turn off all the issues and all the rules and all the drama and just create.

especially the rules!

then if you feel the need, there is always the post-create self-edit?

happy radiohead day (qotd:101007)

one of my dearest friends, gina, messaged me today.
“happy radiohead day”

omg! how could i forget...

“is that 2day?”
i scrambled (dramatization?) toward the radiohead “dead air space” website. i had meant to get their new only-downloadable-from-their-website album the moment it was self-leaked.
eep!

another im came.
“used liz’s dnld link... do you want mine?”

omg omg omgomgomg!

“sure”

gina: “you’re gonna cry”

13 minutes later i was listening to the album track by track. i got stuck at ”nude” and listened twice. then at “weird fishes/arpeggi.” listened several times.

then it started... i had called her a liar...

i cried.

and i kept listening... “all i need” is painfully beautiful “...i'm the next act waiting in the wings... i'm an animal trapped in your parked car... i am all the days 
that you choose to ignore... you are all i need...”

i think i’ve listened to this album through about a hundred times in the past 3 hours. so far this is my fav.

it’s called “videotape”

“when i'm at the pearly gates
this will be on my videotape, my videotape
mephistopheles is just beneath
and he's reaching up to grab me

this is one for the good days
and i have it all here
in red, blue, green

red, blue, green

you are my center
when i spin away
out of control on videotape
on videotape
on videotape
on videotape

this is my way of saying goodbye
because i can't do it face to face
i'm talking to you after it's too late
from my videotape

no matter what happens now
you shouldn't be afraid
because i know today has been the most perfect day i've ever seen.”

...if you want it... (qotd:100907)

On today's date in 1940, John Lennon was born. To celebrate, we went to see Across the Universe the new film directed by Julie Taymor featuring the music of the Beatles. I suddenly realized the significance of the timing of this film. We are in a war that is often compared to the war in Viet Nam. And we still talk of peace as if it’s the silly dreams of hippie fairy tails.

Lennon’s message was simple and yet profound. The most profound things usually are straightforward. That’s why in his honor I chose this quote of the day.

“...All you need is Love...”

poster reads:
WAR IS OVER!
if you want it
Happy Christmas from John & Yoko

if you've ever worked with any public service, then you know this is true. (qotd:092407)

so i was headed out to seattle for a little excursion. on the plane, the battery for my computer died. so i pulled out the usairways magazine and quickly shuffled back to the crossword and puzzle pages.

my qotd was the answer to one of the letter drop puzzles. it was an unexpected laugh. i love that!


“I personally think we developed language because of our deep inner need to complain.”
--Lily Tomlin


ps: i heart lily tomlin!

...its too easy to wish you harm... qotd(092307)

Smokey Joe by Tori Amos has been in my head for a solid week. so really this should be my quote of the week. however, in an attempt to exorcize this demon, i put it on paper.

well, figuratively anyway.

if you are unfamiliar with Tori and her current album American Doll Posse (and quite frankly, out of the loop...), she often takes on the guise of the women who are (yes, are) her songs. in this album she just spelled it out for everyone. there are sides of her identity that present themselves when the situation warrants. these women are her posse, and they are

Pip
Santa











Tori

Isabel

and Clyde.

they all have their own special talents, and their own blogs. for more info, ask me or check out the toriphoria page http://www.yessaid.com/ also: http://toriamos.com and http://www.undented.com/ .

Pip sings this one. check out her blog at http://pipolitics.livejournal.com/


Smokey Joe you're calling at the station
"if I kill him there are complications"
i did not ask for this
"oh, but Love, yes you did"

maybe it terrifies me
this quiet siege
maybe it terrifies me

it's too easy
it's too easy
to wish you harm

you through black ice
at the bottom of the river


Smokey Joe, hey, what's a revelation
"that one's past is not a destination
it is a road for fools
who need empty approvals"

my dark twin
the annihilating Feminine
does not need
civilizing


...maybe it terrifies me
it's too easy to wish you harm...

...Smokey Joe is calling at the station...


for a reason, coincidence or otherwise, i started my walk with Smokey Joe shortly after my annoying, needy, self-centered ex text me yet again. every time i think of him or hear of him it makes me smile to think of his misery. and “maybe it terrifies me” that i can imagine such cruelty. or maybe i revel in it? either way i can’t really spend the time worrying about him and that past.

its time to work on my own karma... and if that means to stop wishing a pox on his head... guess i could try?



bonus download: Cruel by Tori Amos from the album From the Choirgirl Hotel (also sung by Pip years before Pip had a name) “...i can be cruel. i don’t know why...”

...and start again... (qotd:090507)

then i was unpacking stuff from boxes from my move... found this bit of music history (!)... used to love this song... still do...

sometimes you have to stop "walking around in circles"... and drop everything... start again... and start again... and start again... and start again... and start again... and start again...

"when the ghostly dust of violence traces everything
and when the gas runs out
just wreck it
you insured the thing.

i don't need to walk around in circles

well i know what i'm doin'

but i can't sigh now that you made the move
it has gone and gone to dogs
lay down on the floor
for the right price i can get everything
slip into the car.
go driving to the farthest star

i don't need to walk around in circles..."

walk around in circles
by soul coughing
album: el oso


...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again ...and start again...

she said, "you have a bad attitude..." (qotd:081107)

continuing in the vein of yesterday’s quote of the day, i came across another song i love. i have diana krall’s version of this (from her disc when i look in your eyes). its a song called “devil may care.”

while that may sound rude. sometimes you have to take that attitude. even if just for the sake of your own personal sanity.

i just wish i could really take this attitude all the time. especially the part about having no regrets. that’s tough! i wish i could live my life wholly and honestly enough to never have a day end wishing it was different.

“no cares for me
i'm happy as i can be
i learn to love and to live
devil may care

no cares and woes
whatever comes later goes
that's how i'll take and i'll give
devil may care

when the day is through, i suffer no regrets
i know that he who frets, loses the night
for only a fool, thinks he can hold back the dawn
he was wise to never tries to revise what's past and gone

live love today, let come tomorrow what may
don't even stop for a sigh, it doesn't help if you cry
that's how i’ll live and i'll die
devil may care”

if you are unfamiliar with the amazing voice of diana krall, please check her out. totally worth a spin even if you aren't into jazz/blues. which why aren't you? it the bee's knees, the cat's pajamas, the quick train from squaresville to hiptown kid-o! (translation: all the cool kids are doing it)

different drummer (qotd:081007)

i have the incredible fortune to have found the most supportive, amazing man on the planet. i’ve found he’d likely do anything for me. but it took half a lifetime to find him. and i had to wade through a lot of muck to get to him.

sometimes the road to your goals can be very lonely. they are very few people on this planet that will understand your need to do something away from the main stream. even those who profess sides with the deviants all seem to eventually sell their dreams for a small salary amongst the rat-racers.

in all my short life experiences i have found one thing to be true: that salary won’t bring happiness. the people i know in those jobs are still unhappy wit their lives and themselves. i left corporate america for a reason, and intend to never return. never look back.

and no one has ever accused me of the travesty of being normal...

so the only choice is obvious. live life. CREATE your happiness. do YOUR thing. LEAD! never follow. MAKE YOUR OWN KIND OF MUSIC!

and if you can make a buck doing it, it will be that much sweeter!

!!DISCLAIMER!! the less you care about what people think of you and your life, the more haters you will attract. they are desperate to bring you down. even your “friends” think its their job to “show you reality.” and get ready to be called crazy!

in the words sung by the diva mama cass (qotd):

“nobody can tell ya
there's only one song worth singin'
they may try and sell ya
'cause it hangs them up
to see someone like you

but you've gotta
make your own kind of music
sing your own special song
make your own kind of music
even if nobody else sings along

you're gonna be knowing
the loneliest kind of lonely
it may be rough going
just to do your thing's
the hardest thing to do

but you've gotta make your own kind of music
sing your own special song
make your own kind of music
even if nobody else sings along

so if you cannot take my hand,
and if you must be goin'
i will understand

you gotta make your own kind of music
sing your own special song
make your own kind of music
even if nobody else sings along”

passing time at fort bragg (qotd:072707)

my brother is at fort bragg preparing with his group to go to the middle east. i guess they have to learn all kinds of stuff this month before they leave. and practice sleeping in tents.

the horror!

i think about him every day and wonder how he is coping. he is very brave about going overseas or puts on a good face about it for sure.

he has seen some drama at the fort. and it is tough place to be. so i’m always anxious to hear news about how things are going.

last night at work i got a text form him. i went into the office to check my phone and see if he was doing alright. maybe he needed something...

it became my quote of the day:
“I am in a brief that would be boring but the woman giving the brief sounds just like Ellen and she’s so far away I can’t tell that she’s not and she’s making me laugh even though it’s not funny. So I could be getting a brief about how not to get killed in Iraq by Ellen. Who knows?”

the visual i got in my head caused me to lmao!

intelligent film (qotd:071807)

I recently watched a film called Shortbus directed by John Cameron Mitchell (Hedwig and the Angry Inch). Justin Bond, the proprietor of the underground “salon” by the name Shortbus (“for the gifted and challenged”) is giving Sofia a tour of the place.

“...now here is our performance room. Tonight we’re having a film festival. (whispers to Sofia) They’re boring as hell. But I find the more boring they are, the more intelligent people think they are for watching.” (qotd:071807)

I just wish I had come across that quote while I was still in film school.

28 days later... (qotd:071707)

so this loser ex of mine keeps writing e-mails to me. at no solicitiation from my end. to what end, i don’t know.

so i sent a firm (nasty) email months ago about my need for him to never make any kind of contact with me ever. written or in person. and i thought we came to a clear, mutual understanding...

months blew past. out of inbox. out of mind.
the way i like it. peace at last!

then a couple days ago i get another e-mail. like we never even had a conversation about maintaining radio silence.

today i was texting to a life long friend about this issue. “y the hell can’t he leave me alone?” i asked. i don’t understand where the breakdown is. i hate him. he is a shit. i want to go the rest of my life never hearing or seeing his name or anything to do with him. he is not a good person. if he had some semblance of a soul, i may consider a friendship over time. but that’s the problem. he is a trash can of a human being. with the most fucked-up ideas about life i’ve ever heard.

he is losing other friends too. not just me. because he treats others like garbage. and i truly believe he is the only person on the planet that he has ever loved.

so my friend text me back my QOTD:

“i know what you mean – they r dead to u but they keep coming back like zombies!”

i couldn’t have put it better myself.
“exactly! that’s the perfect analogy!” i replied.

declare independence (qotd:070407)

On the 2nd I went to St. Louis for my partner’s birthday. He is a pilot and was there for a simulator training session that all pilots go through annually. Then on Tuesday I made my way back home to Chicago.

On my way home my iPod found the Children of Men soundtrack. I love it. It is a really great collection of songs including Running the World by Jarvis Cocker and covers of Tomorrow Never Knows (the Beatles) and Ruby Tuesday (the Rolling Stones).

Today being Independence Day, I thought it appropriate to start with another song from that soundtrack. It is my lengthy quote of the day. It is Bring on the Lucie (Freeda People) by John Lennon.

“We don't care what flag you're waving
We don't even want to know your name
We don't care where you're from or where you're going
All we know is that you came
You're making all our decisions
We have just one request of you
That while you're thinking things over
Here's something you just got to do

Free the people now
Do it, do it, do it, do it, do it now
Free the people now
Do it, do it, do it, do it, do it now

Well we were caught with our hands in the air
Don't despair paranoia is everywhere
We can shake it with love when we're scared
So let's shout it aloud like a prayer

Do it, do it, do it, do it, do it now
Do it, do it, do it, do it, do it now

We don’t care what rules you’re playing
We don't want to play your game
You think you're cool and know what you are doing
666 is your name
So while you're jerking off each other
You bear this thought in mind
Your time is come you better know it
But maybe you can't read the signs

Free the people now
Do it, do it, do it, do it, do it now

Well you were caught with your hands in the kill
And you still got to swallow your pill
As you slip and you slide down the hill
On the blood of the people you killed

Stop the killing (Free the people now)
Do it, do it, do it, do it, do it now

Bring on the lucie”

It was written during our war in Vietnam, a day not unlike the present. It is a protest song asking those making the rules to “free the people” and stop their self-serving, evil dealings. This is not a mild mannered song.

Lennon likens the leader to the Antichrist and we find ourselves under just such a tyrant. We have a president that has fooled a part of the country into believing he is sent from god and that he is a Christian. Instead he governs in a way that doesn’t benefit the people as promised.

As 2008 elections rapidly approach, I take comfort in the line “…so while you're jerking off each other… you bear this thought in mind… your time is come you better know it…”










Download: Declare Independence by Bjork (Volta)